If You Want to Stop Smoking, Drinking or...

The bait and switch of addiction

You can be addicted to much more than cigarettes or alcohol. I will expand on something I discovered last year. And you might be surprised where this is going.

I used to smoke. I was a light smoker but still …I smoked. I stopped completely around 15 or 16 years ago after kinda starting in the mid-90s. Because of partying every other weekend. After a couple of vodkas, I would get a pack of Marlboro Lights. But I got hooked and I hated it. Why? Because I consider myself a health-conscious person and I felt deep personal shame. I battled the itch for years. I remember spacing out my cigs, one in the morning driving to work. One or two and noon. One on the way home. One before bed. Finally, in a moment, I snapped out of it and quit. I dropped it in a moment when I discovered that someone, I deeply loved had picked up the habit. Years of trying to quit solidified in a single moment and the desire was crushed like a smoldering butt.

I believe that you don’t stop any addiction over time, you change in a moment. I tried a cigarette a few months after I stopped. I was floored by how incredibly awful the taste was. I could not finish the cigarette. It reopened my eyes to, not only the tar and nicotine but the toxic fumes I had once been inhaling.

I’ve been extremely anti-smoking for many years now for many reasons. One, of course, is how people pay for early death through the nose for the privilege to die gasping for air from toxic ruined lungs. One of the many other reasons is 450,000 people, die yearly from illness and/or complications caused by tobacco (dippers this includes you) addiction.

About 9 months ago I stumbled upon an awesome book. I read the free 10% sample. I became intrigued enough to buy it. The book is “Allen Carr’s Easy Way To Stop Smoking”. Other than having a great first name the opening lines were great. I read the book in mere hours with many highlights. If you want to stop smoking, I cannot recommend this book enough. It is powerful.

Let me put it in a nutshell and then relate it to other common addictions.

When you draw in that first hit of a cigarette you take in what is probably the most addictive substance known: nicotine. That drug brings with it huge amounts of toxic fumes. You love the nicotine so much you’re willing to poison your system with its unavoidable fumes that disrupt and damage your central nervous system. It literally compromises your ability to cope well with daily life, much less the stress that is sure to come for any of us.

When you smoke a cigarette, it is literally creating a craving for the next one. The craving causes anxiety. And here’s where the bait and switch happens. Life is full of stress and the lack of nicotine now adds to that normal stress of life. And you think, “Oh I need a cigarette.” You smoke it and the stress caused by the “lack” of nicotine is satisfied. You get a little victory or a fleeting feeling of stress relief. But it is a false victory. You know that it doesn’t actually solve the family or work stress. It ONLY solved the stress created by the nicotine which only gives a little false satisfaction.

It is as if nicotine creates a little gremlin in your nervous system as your body detoxes. A little hole has been burrowed by this gremlin in your nervous system (and psyche) that only the nicotine gremlin can fill. It badgers you to fill that emptiness and you mistakenly think that only life is stressing when it's the nicotine gremlin too.

When you smoke a cigarette, it is literally creating a craving for the next one. The craving causes anxiety again. And here’s where the bait and switch happens.

Life is full of stress and the lack of nicotine now adds to that normal stress of life. And you think, “Oh I need a cigarette.” You smoke it and the stress caused by the “lack” of nicotine is satisfied. You get a little victory or a fleeting feeling of stress relief. But it is a false victory because you've created the chain to the next craving. You know that it doesn’t actually solve the family or work stress. It ONLY solved the stress created by the nicotine ...momentarily.

Think about how much better you could deal with stress without the added stress of the nicotine gremlin. You smoke to end the distress. The cigarette itself does not provide enjoyment, but it temporarily ends the aggravation of wanting a cigarette.

Being fascinated with this take on addiction I also read Annie Grace’s book The Naked Mind. To my surprise, she had applied Allen Carr’s philosophy to alcohol addiction. Basically, if you drink alcohol to dampen stress, you’re actually creating more stress and a cycle of dependency which is agony in and of itself.

Alcohol is one of the most toxic substances on earth. Notice how most need to dilute this literal poison with Coke or juice or something. It literally attacks your organs, especially the liver and brain. It literally causes stress by the devastation it leaves in your body with its lingering results even after you’ve sobered up.

It also destroys your reasoning ability, which should be obvious. We’ve all seen those, “Hold my beer” moments that, if not comical, are often tragic, an automobile accident, a fall, a family dispute unnecessarily intensified, and relationships ruined for what you can’t take back after your lips are loosened by liquor.

Like nicotine, alcohol can create a stress gremlin in your system. And you get a false victory by slamming a few shots or drinking a six-pack.

I truly believe this is why the bible states do not be drunk. God does not want us to go through the added stress.

You can face the world without cigarettes. You can meet the world without alcohol. You’re not going to die tonight if you stop smoking. You’re not going to die tonight if you resist draining a bottle of whiskey.

You are creating another problem to add to the ones you already have. When life sends stress your way, and of course it will, calming the monster created by cigarettes and alcohol abuse are only avoidance. Stress and fear are like barking dogs. Run from them and they will chase you.

In Annie Grace’s book, she puts forth an idea that is awesome.

You have an incredible God-given body and brain. Face your problems "naked" without the false adornment of addictions. Don’t fall for the false god of addiction to solve a problem that a false god created to keep you enslaved and worshiping it with your rituals. Use what God gave you not what the darkness gave you.

So, you don’t smoke or drink. Good for you. Or you do smoke and drink. There are other addictions that ought to be obvious, like biting your fingernails, gambling, and porn.

When look back on my addiction to cigarettes I see it completely differently now. I was so fearful and didn't need to be. I thought the addiction itself was such a powerful disease that I would need to go to Smokaholics Anonymous.

But in retrospect, I see it like this and I think all addictions are like this. Imagine your car has a transmission issue but it still runs. It stresses you out constantly. But instead of facing that problem, you bust your windshield on purpose. The stress of the broken windshield distracts you from the transmission problem. And when you get it fixed your stress level goes down. You didn't enjoy the broken window/cigarette, but you did enjoy the relief of getting it fixed (a fix).

The same thing is happening with our smartphones and social media.

It has been admitted and revealed by the creators of social media like Facebook that they wanted to get you hooked. One guy on the inside saw this, got out, and won’t even allow his kids to use any social media.

I have to admit that I am severely addicted to social media, Facebook to be clear. It feeds my ego to get a “reaction” or get into a spirited debate and crush my opponent.

Why?

Let’s face it. Mundane life is full of obstacles and stress. I don’t have the power to crush the Deep State. My credit card interest is too high. I can’t take the vacation needed. I’m stuck here as my AC struggles and the dog is getting out of the fence. The yard needs mowing and I ran out of weed-eating string, there's a hole in the screen door. Work is often stressful. I can’t seem to find the time to write my next book. I just want an hour of stress-free existence to spend time with the Bible, or family or friends.

Like the old Bob Seger, “I Feel Like a Number”.

“I'm just another statistic on a sheet

To teachers, I'm just another child

To the IRS I'm another file

I'm just another consensus on the street

Gonna cruise outta this city, head down to the sea

Gonna shout out at the ocean, hey it's me”

And when you get 100 shares and/or 50 reactions/comments on a Facebook post you feel like more than a number. You’re not that guy with the hole in his sock. You’re not that guy watching his budget even though you really need a haircut. You’re not that guy stressing because you have to put car repairs on your credit card …again.

When you crush it on Facebook or Twitter you feel like you stuck it in the eye of an anxiety-ridden world. You made them laugh, you made them think, you made them think you are really REALLY smart and extremely knowledgeable when really you just read a book or had an accidental brilliant thought while mowing your yard.

You feel the satisfaction of believing you're important to a thousand strangers. You “won” the debate. The other guy went into his turtle shell and you danced on his philosophical grave. But the dishes are not done and the pile of clothes needs washing and screen door needs fixing and the house needs vacuuming.

Winning a debate or confounding someone with your brilliance or getting a thousand reactions or a million shares of your insightful funny meme is not the problem we really need to solve or answer. But we feel a sense of superiority about our oh-so-great insight that the momentary dopamine hit soothes deeper needs for an instant.

A need to know deep in your soul that God loves you like the widow with one mite and that he can give you the bravery of a boy with a slingshot against a giant, or the spiritual strength of St Paul.

“Come unto me all who are heavy laden and I will give you rest” from all the agony of your false cures.

God let this be my prayer and my hope for me and all those like me.